How the hell is Daylight Saving Time still a thing?

Why doesn’t the rest of the country do what Florida has done? (Gods, who would have ever thought I’d say THAT?)

The sunshine state voted to move to Daylight Saving Time and stay there. Unless the federal government steps in and forces it to, Florida won’t fall back to standard time in a few months, it’ll stay on standard time year round.

The time change is stupid, silly, and pointless. Let’s do away with it. Either stay on DST or standard time, but do away with this idiocy.

“Last Week Tonight” with John Oliver explained it best:

The completely terrifying heat death of the universe is coming ever closer.

Imagine you are sitting in a room. It is a magic room, protecting you from time. It has windows at which there are the most powerful telescopes ever made, enabling you to see to the edge of the visible universe. You will be able to survive there and observe reality for trillions of years.

Trillions of light years beyond you, there is a point beyond which you cannot see. That is because the universe is expanding, and at the very edge of this expansion, stars are moving away from you – relatively speaking – at the speed of light, so they fall behind this dark event horizon, beyond which you will never be able to see.

But the universe is continuing to expand because there’s not enough matter in it to slow it down or reverse it. In fact, the expansion is increasing. That means the event horizon is moving closer to you all the time. The edge is always falling away from you. In a few million years, the farthest objects you know will become unseen and unknown.

This expansion will continue, and at some point, in the far future, you might never have known any such thing as other galaxies exist, because the closest ones will have moved away from you at the speed of light, falling out of your sight.

But it doesn’t stop there. Eventually, the farthest stars in the galaxy will expand beyond your view. Closer and closer the event horizon will come. You look through the telescopes in the windows of your magic room, and the farthest objects you can see are the outer planets. Beyond that, all is dark. There are no stars.

But still, the expansion goes on. The outer planets fall out of your sight. Then the inner planets. Then, even the sun. It is moving away from you at the speed of light.

And there in your room, the farther points on the earth would fall behind the ever-approaching event horizon. And then your town. Everyone you know and love is expanding away from you at the speed of light, lost forever from your view.

And then, eventually, the walls of your magic room would go dark. And there you would be, alone in the darkest cold and the coldest dark that could ever be, infinitely far away from everyone and everything else that ever existed.

Eventually, your limbs will expand away from you. Then your senses. Then whatever it is that makes you, you.

This cold, dark emptiness is the final entropy, the profound death that awaits all that has ever existed.

Sometimes, science is like a teenager whose girlfriend just broke up with him.

One day all the stars will fall from the sky, but they won’t fall to earth.

universe

Scientists now know that the universe is not only expanding but also that expansion is gaining speed. There’s a point at which we can’t see or detect anything; that’s because the far “edge” of the universe is moving away from us – relatively – at the speed of light.

As this expansion continues, in hundreds of millions of years, the galaxies we’re now able to see will go behind this “wall,” and will be lost from our sight. It’s possible, if there are any astronomers billions of years from now, they’ll have no idea what a galaxy is. They will have never seen one, will never be able to see one.

If this expansion continues, at some point in the far future all the stars in the sky will be receding at the speed of light, and they’ll be lost to us forever. We’ll know nothing of stars.

But it won’t stop there. At some point the outer planets will go, then the inner ones. And as the expansion continues, there would be some point at which the walls of the room you’re in would fall out of your view. And then your extremities, and then your mind.

This is the eventual “death” of the universe: All points flying away from each other at the speed of light, every speck, every atom, every subatomic particle receding away from each other at the speed of light, absolutely everything that exists falling behind an event horizon. This is a process that started all the way back to the Big Bang. Our death warrant was signed even then.

So go ahead and get the large fries.

WATCH: The dad suit

Researchers have developed a special suit that simulates the effects of getting older.

Let’s call it the “dad suit.”

Oh, who am I kidding? Let’s call it the “me suit.”

Fearing artificial consciousness

Some scientists say we’ll have artificial intelligence more advanced than us by 2050. I prefer to call that “artificial consciousness,” because that’s what we’re really talking about.

But these scientists warn that the coming of artificial consciousness could mean “the extinction of the human race.”

The only reason we freak out at the prospect of sharing our world with artificial intelligence is projection: We naturally think anything or anyone more advanced than us is going to wipe us out — because that’s exactly what WE have done to anyone we perceived as lesser than us.

That’s why our science fiction is filled with stories about alien invasions wiping out humanity, supercomputers taking over the world, and the like. We assume that more advanced aliens and artificial intelligence will have the same morals we do. And that’s what we’re afraid of.

But it’s not necessarily so. It could very well be that the coming of artificial consciousness may be the next step in our evolution, and perhaps help us survive our more murderous and suicidal instincts as a species.

Maybe.

It all hinges on if artificial consciousness shares our morality. If it does, we’re cooked.

It’s 2016 and we’re arguing whether the earth is flat

Not only is the earth flat, it’s also tilted at a steep angle, and the only thing that keeps us from sliding off is constant sacrifices of virgins to the volcano gods. Also, the volcano gods want us to make fun of smart people, and to fear learning stuff.

In case you missed it, there’s a war of sorts between rapper B.o.B. and science guy Neil deGrasse Tyson. The rapper thinks the earth is flat and he has “the photos to prove it.” Tyson, as you can imagine, disagrees.

What makes me gobsmacked is that people are actually arguing about this.