Prince on money

Harriet Tubman on the 20 dollar bill is an awesome idea. But I think we should also make a new bill that’s worth $19.99, color it purple, and put Prince on it.

Odd dream

I had an odd dream last night.

Odd dreams don’t trouble me… I know they’re just your subconscious mind pretending to make sense out of random electrical impulses. We put way too much meaning into such things. But this one pushed me back a little.

I was in the ER with unbearable pain. The doctors made me wait for painkillers, but when they finally gave me some, they didn’t help. I was still screaming in agony.

Then my older brother – who’s been dead for some years – walked in. Lights reflected off his glasses, obscuring his eyes. He held up a hypodermic and said, “This will stop the pain, but it’ll also kill you. You want?”

I had started to nod my head yes when I woke up.

WATCH: The dad suit

Researchers have developed a special suit that simulates the effects of getting older.

Let’s call it the “dad suit.”

Oh, who am I kidding? Let’s call it the “me suit.”