I need a new brain

I was sleepy. That’s the excuse I’m going with.

I took my car in for an oil change Sunday morning. Before they changed the oil, they wanted to check and see that all my lights are working.

They asked me to turn on my headlights.

At that point, my brain went into shutdown.

Turn on the lights? Something I do in my car ALL THE TIME? Something I do in my car ALL THE TIME FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS I’VE BEEN DRIVING IT?

I can’t remember how to turn on the headlights.

I sat there, absolutely perplexed. I’m sure it was only a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity. Like the way other people feel when I’m telling one of my stories.

The mechanic finally reached in and turned on my headlights for me. “Not your car?” he asked.

I almost said no, but finally offered sheepishly, “I’m still asleep. I was up late last night.”

“Uh huh,” the mechanic said, very plainly thinking, “My god, what an idiot.”

I need a new brain.