Even though it’s a Saturday morning, it’s still a rough one due to not falling fully asleep last night. With the neighboring park full of screaming basketball, baseball and tennis players, and with the cats going nuts for breakfast, there was no sleeping in to catch up.

I’d take Ambien, but Ambien and living alone are a bad combination.

“Mr. Archer, you’re accused of driving around Hollywood naked with a car full of dogs and cats. How do you plead?”

“I WAS SLEEP-WALKING ON AMBIEN AND NO ONE STOPPED ME!”

“Sure, Mr. Archer. On to the animal sex predator registry you go.”

Not that I’m paranoid or anything.