I had a very strange dream right before I woke up Sunday morning. I was Ned Stark, and I heard reports of strange people seen outside the walls at Winterfell, so I went out to investigate.

I saw crowds of young girls holding up square devices that flashed at me and made clicking noises. And then men clad in black uniforms — but not the Night’s Watch — made them go away. I tried to follow but was held back by some strange sorcery that wouldn’t let me move forward.

So I went back inside the walls and discovered that Winterfell was really an apartment building. I pondered how I knew what such a thing as an apartment building was, and then some strange man I’d never seen before slapped the back of my head and said, “Dude, get it the F together or HBO’s gonna cancel the show!”

Then I woke up. The cats were yowling to be fed and threatening to send me to the wall if I didn’t feed them.


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