text_on_t1I have to admit I got a perverse thrill the first time I tweeted while taking a dump. The idea that I was writing something that could be seen, hypothetically, all over the world while at the same time, you know, eliminating. But that was a couple of years ago. That was also the day I learned that yes, it is possible to eat too much pizza and not enough vegetables.

A new study shows that 75% of Americans admit to using their smartphones while on the toilet. Which is actually a good thing — that means when someone you’re trying to hook up with says the reason he or she never called back was because their phone got dropped in the toilet, it could have been the truth.

(By the way, it’s about the same number of women as men who use their smartphones on the john.)

The breakdown by popular phones is this: 87% of Android users, 84% of Blackberry users, and 77% of iPhone users (which might indicate that iPhones are a little cleaner).

I don’t know about you, but I can’t even go to the bathroom without making sure I’ve got my phone with me. Which is weird, because I face a conundrum every time it rings and I have to make a decision whether to answer and hope they don’t hear the bathroom stall echo (I sure as hell can’t flush while talking), or let it go to voicemail and keep tweeting, “You won’t believe what I’m doing right now!”