Don’t ask for a raise

Some people are all guts and glory and can march into the boss’s office at the drop of a hat, demanding raises. Sometimes it pays off and they get it, other times the boss either ignores or fires them. But here’s a boss – Rolandas Milinavicius, the owner of a car dealership in Atlanta – who had a different solution to pesky employees asking for more money.

He’s been accused of killing two employees because they kept asking for pay raises. He’s been charged with two counts of murder in the shooting deaths of Inga Contreras and Martynas Simokaitis.

So if you’re thinking of asking for a raise, check the boss’s mood first. Oh, and make sure he doesn’t have any guns handy.

Michael Moore subpoenaed

Michael Moore was on Leno last night and said he’d just found out the White House was issuing a subpoena for him because of his trip to Cuba.

Maybe Moore should just refuse it. Harriet Miers and Josh Bolten did!

Short term memory loss caused by long commutes

Ah, this explains why I can’t remember things anymore. It’s rush hour in Los Angeles that’s doing it to me.

What were we talking about?

Long commutes, research has shown, can lead to loss of short-term memory, more days of missed work and such ailments as higher blood pressure, muscle tension and an accelerated heart rate.

Conchords

“Rome” was one of my all-time favorite shows. HBO canceled it. Then “Sopranos” ended. “Curb Your Enthusiasm” is far, far away. So is “The Extras.” So maybe it’s time to cancel HBO, at least for a few months.

But wait! Now they’ve given me my new favorite show, “Flight of the Conchords“!

No, I’m not going to try and describe it to you. Let’s just say that you can laugh your ass off whether your baked or not. Not that I’m ever baked.

"Bat Boy," we hardly knew ye


Maybe the editors have been abducted by shape-shifting lizard aliens, you know, the ones behind the Kennedy assassination (or the ones who kept his head alive), behind 9-11, behind the birth of the Bush twins…

The “newspaper” and web site Weekly World News is going under. American Media, the owners, have decided to suspend publication. There’s word that they had a buyout offer but turned it down.

Who’s going to give us updates on that microphone they shoved into a volcano and heard screams from Hell?